So, I went out with my friends last night for the first time. We all got ready together and hung out at my apartment for awhile until they were ready to go. I wasn’t feeling too hot last night, so I stayed back for a little while – dropped them off and headed back. I decided to go with them like an hour later. So, when I showed up everyone had a few drinks already. Me and all my friends have a habit of drinking a lot before we go anywhere, then once we get where we’re going, we don’t drink much at all. Perfect, right? That way I wouldn’t be tempted to drink as much because no one else would really be drinking either.
I got there and my closest knit group of friends was there already. Honestly, I had a blast. I got to hang out with all my friends and just have a good time. Usually, well before this “change”, I would focus on 1. drinking, 2. meeting/getting hit on by new people, 3. drinking more, which usually involved me leaving my friends for this quest. But now that my priorities have changed so much, and drinking wasn’t such a big one, I just got to spend time with my friends and really enjoy their company. Sure, they were all a bit tipsy, maybe some a little drunk. But they were funny and enjoyable and it was just a great time. I did take a sip of some of their drinks and realized that I don’t even like the taste of alcohol. I never really have. Let’s be honest, alcohol just doesn’t taste good. (Well, I like wine but that’s about the only thing I can say I truly enjoy drinking). It made me wonder why I used to enjoy drinking so much. Whenever I took a shot, I would cringe and it would just be awful. That’s the way I feel about alcohol in general. It only tastes good when it’s so watered down by soda or fruit juice or something that there’s barely any alcohol left in it. So now, I don’t get what the big deal is. Funny, huh?
Also, I ran into that same friend from a few days ago that was giving me a hard time about going to my friends birthday party. Yet again, he was being a huge ass. Then, tried to make up for it by telling me how much he loves me and he said that I should know “how he really feels about me” – he’s asked me to be his girlfriend at least 10 times. Haha. Poor kid. He apologized for being rude when I brought it to his attention. Then we got to talking. He said he’s been either hammered or high for eight straight days. EIGHT. He calls it “raging.” I just don’t know know what would make a man want to be like that. I hope he realizes that that is going to turn into a problem. This is also our third year at school and he’s switching his major again because he’s doing so poorly in his classes. First year, he was pre-med. Second year, he was pre-law (with me actually – at the end of the semester he asked me to send him all my notes because he hadn’t paid attention at all and was on academic probation). Now, he’s journalism. Fulfilling life? I don’t think so. Graduation is in two years and he’s setting up almost no future for himself besides alcoholism. And honestly, if I hadn’t caught myself now, I probably would too.
Side note: There’s a running joke around Creighton, and I’m sure colleges everywhere, that says you’re not an alcoholic until you graduate. “It’s college” we all say. Maybe that’s just a roundabout way to say that we all have a problem and none of us really want to deal with it. So, we push it away.
I also realized last night how sleazy the general male (and female) population is in this environment. Everyone there is after one thing. Sure, it’s nice when a guy buys you a drink and he tells you you’re really cute. But is he genuinely interested in dating you? Doubtful. That’s another problem that I’ve come face to face with. I’ve had guys legitimately straight-up ask me if I want to hook up with them. Umm, no. No I don’t. And maybe, that’s why I’m not dating anyone right now because I only put myself in these bad situations with these sleazy guys and I haven’t met anyone who is a decent, genuinely good person. So, hopefully in going to more church events, I’ll meet more good Christian guys (don’t worry – that’s not my motive for this. I’ve sworn off dating for quite some time). Maybe I should do a study on dating patterns in drinking environments. Haha. That’d be a hoot.
So that was my night. I went out, spent time just being with my friends, and had a really good time. But just for my own sanity (so that I don’t spend my time around drunk people), I’m going to say no this weekend and maybe spend some time out West again. Or maybe, instead of trying to make other plans in order to get around going out with my friends, I’ll just say “no”.